The rest of this (under construction) page is about trying to place a counter on the page. Why the hell anyone should want such a thing, apart from terminal vanity, completely eludes me. But they're pretty, look fairly easy, so I thought I'd have a bash. Don't read on, unless you want a free laugh at the html virgin.

 Not the first, and hopefully not the last....this was to be my slogan at the counter. Ha!!
<img src="http://www.ednet.co.uk/cgi-bin/Count.cgi?user=magnificat              &df=hit-count-file&dd=C">

Down, but by no means out....watch this space and get counted!!!
Off to learn the delights of cute ftp. I must say edNET's tutorials are pitched somewhat above the beginner.

Well, I successfully created a file public_html/log in my space....lets see what happens if we publish now....

Absolutely nothing. Hmmmm. Ever get the feeling you are sooooo close?

Five and a half hours on counter. It doesn't work, and it's on the wrong page. Ho hum.

Six and a half hours. It disappeared completely. On both ~magnificat/ and /home/magnificat/public_html/. Then it reappeared in one of them. Can't remember which.  Lost interest. This should be so easy and so pleasant. I don't feel instructed properly.

Friday morning, 27 Feb 98, and taking stock. Yesterday I failed to install a counter, and the day before I failed to modify Tony's animated gif. So much for just taking things from other sites. The future holds a dilemma. (Note, dilemma means TWO choices. Any more and it ain't one.)

Lemma 1. Try something else, on the "third time lucky" principle.
Lemma 2. Persevere with either or both of the previous problems, on the "when the going gets nets doings, and move it to my public_html
Creepy thing, moving files on someone else's computer.
 
I feel a Counter coming on. It must have been so much easier for Granny.

Well..yes and no. A limited success. We created a counter... in ~magnificat/counter.htm
It was attractive, and showed the figure 000002. This was hugely encouraging, having taken us through, composer, cute ftp, wordpad, cut, copy, paste, help, make a cup of coffee, smoke, genitalise, ...what a night.

Thinking, joyfully but naively, that if I left my new counter and then returned, it might then display the number 3, and after that even 4, and so on, serially, there came yet another knockback....a barely decipherable message saying Host: ednet.co.uk not in auth block of conf file. Tell it like it is, babe.

Already learned: <HTML> <HEAD> <TITLE> A knighthood, maybe? </TITLE> </HEAD> <BODY> cute ass, baby </BODY> </HTML> Piece of piss, really.

Already learned: but don't try and write the above in Composer. Do it in Wordpad. So what the fuck does composer actually do?????

Kinda suspect that: the reason I'm having trouble linking from this page to counter.htm is that I'm writing the complete ftp site as the link site. The same fault occurs in Granny's Visitors' Book site. Now I'm just gonna write the last wee bit....

Let's try it....

It's a miracle. Truly. Not only did the link work (once I remembered to reload my page) but it showed a COUNTER! Showing the number THREE!!. In a moment I'm gonna do it again, and see if it shows....you guessed it....FOUR!!!

"To sleep, perchance to dream of html links...."

The next stage, of course, is to display the damn counter on the page. About this, the edNET notes are strangely silent. Just gonna go and see if it shows FOUR this time. Awesome. Who would have thought, 49 years ago, how useful the concept of counting would be? No wonder my parents kept on about it.

Tony has kindly replied to my beseeching email, and even though obviously furious at my correcting his one and only spelling mistake in his entire life, has told me how to get the damn counter here onto this page. You apparently save the counter as a web page, then just paste it into this one, so it ends up....
 
well....not here, clearly. :( 

He says I should load it into my editor, (more about her later, and there's an interesting link to Granny's Shady Pines here) copy the html, then paste it here....

<HTML>
<HEAD>
<TITLE> You are visitor number </TITLE>
</HEAD>
<BODY>
<img src="http://www.ednet.co.uk/cgi-bin/Count.cgi?user=magnificat&df=hit-count-file&dd=C">
</BODY>
</HTML>

The above is pretty much what I expected. Ho hum.(again). :(
Have to repeat....what the f*ck does composer actually DO?

I'll try and publish this, and see what it looks like on the navigator. But....ah hae me doots.

OK...then let's do some deleting....
 
 <img src="http://www.ednet.co.uk/cgi-bin/Count.cgi?user=magnificat&df=hit-count-file&dd=C">

no...had this one loads of times. Maybe if we make it a paragraph....

<P>
<img src="http://www.ednet.co.uk/cgi-bin/Count.cgi?user=magnificat&df=hit-count-file&dd=C">
</P>

Two more failed attempts. HTML is total shite, by the way. And so are Composer and HomeSite. And they can sue me for that. User friendly? I would rather befriend a grizzly bear with PMT

However, as my counter now shows an encouraging figure 7, I can see that the magnificat fans are out there waiting for some decent shit. Gotta get this act together.

Can anyone help me?
Please email to
magnificat@ednet.co.uk in return for which I'll link to your page if you want.
(I wouldn't even think of trying to write an email link here.)

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